How do we know? Are we ever really ready? Or are we always as ready as we’ll ever be? I guess the right time is always the very time it happens. But is there a way to know? A way to predict? Or would things just be too easy then? I’m not certain. But something tells me it’s different this time. Something tells me I am ready. I don’t know what it is. But even though I’m afraid to really believe it this time around, I feel I have little choice. What else can I do, than to act according to what it feels like right now? I can remain passive, sure. But I’ll be unsettled. I’ll always have that voice in my head. But then again, I fear no matter what the choice is, the voice will remain. There will always be that ‘what if?’. But maybe not. Maybe this is what I’m learning to let go of. What if. What if? There’s no such thing. Present moment. Present moment. Always back to present moment. And now. In this moment, everything feels just right. Who am I to deny this? Who am I to look for the fault in the way things are? Who am I to doubt myself? Who am I to question the things I do for myself and the process I’ve dove into in this journey?
I’ve been pondering the difference between being moved by free will versus by the mere necessity of the situation and I think I’ve come to understand that there is little difference. If the circumstances call us to act in a certain way it is also based on some sort of choice whether conscious or not. Equally, even if we feel completely free in our choices, whatever we choose is always going to be the only thing we were truly capable of doing in that very moment. This is why we cannot be blamed for anything yet we are always responsible for everything. It is a gentle yet a tough truth that we deal with every second of our existence. Now, am I ready? Yes and no, no and yes. As ready as i choose, as ready as I’m destined. I’m always ready. Always ready. That is my truth. Over and out.